Goodbye Autumn!

November 13, 2018
Well, it looks like Autumn is coming to an end. The nights have drawn in, the rain has come and the trees are looking a bit bare - the temperature, however, it still balmy most days so I'm relishing the last of it while I can (I hate the cold!).

And so with the change of seasons, comes a little update from me - I like to pause and reflect at certain points in the year and season changes seem logical.


The last few months haven't been the easiest for us, leading to lots of questioning on my part - mainly because I am a chronic over-thinker. I turn things over in my mind, I look at everything from every angle, I lay in bed at night imagining various different outcomes and options - it's not always a bad thing - it can be really amazing in fact, but it can turn into intense worry, and is pretty draining at times!

You'll know from my previous post that I was feeling in a bit of a dark place and I couldn't put my finger on why - well that appears to have lifted now, and I've had a couple of weeks of focusing on real life and I'm feeling much more hopeful and optimistic. Amazing what a bit of self-care and time with the family can achieve. I also totally believe in bringing these things out into the open, calling the devil out on stuff and he scurries away pretty quick!

We've had half term so was nice to have the kids around, we've celebrated Jon's birthday, marvelled at how old we're getting and have been working hard. We visited our old church - which is always refreshing - and spent time with our extended family. It's been the simple things, but things that have led me to look up, be grateful, and rise above all the rubbish.

So, things I'm grateful for this autumn:

  • My kids. They astound me every day at how clever they are. They are both doing great in school/nursery and are proper bright sparks. They are kind and sensitive, but both full of confidence and I cannot believe that they came from us - I often feel like I'm nothing special, and yet my kids are heaven-sent.
  • My home. We moved in at the end of August and each day I notice new things that I love about our house. Last week it was the view - we live high up on a ridge that looks out across the southern part of our town. It's pretty industrial - we overlook the railway below and to the right there's an industrial estate, but we have an unobstructed panoramic view across the whole area. Last week was... fireworks night! We hadn't planned to see any displays (I told you, I hate the cold!) but every night over the last few weekends we have been treated to our very own fireworks displays - some of which were pretty spectacular!
  • Time. I am constantly guilty of doing too much and it can be a battle to take a step back, get back to basics, simplify and take time. I've been trying to do that lately and I feel much better for it. I've been focusing on the important things and trying to take a step back from things that drain me - being an introvert this is so important, and if I focus on the meaningful things, and the things that energise me, I feel more positive, optimistic, creative and motivated to make changes in my life.

Things I'm hopeful for this winter:

  • Christmas! Well, seeing as I now have a beautiful home with space, I am looking forward to Christmas and decorating our house and making it all cosy! It might take a couple of years to get it perfect - as money allows - but it's the perfect blank canvas ready for a festive refresh.
  • Productive evenings. As the evenings get darker, all I want to do is lie on the sofa under a blanket and watch Netflix. However, whilst everything is OK in moderation, binge watching Nashville is not a productive or positive way to spend the winter. I'd like to write more, read more and study more. This will require discipline... so much discipline!
  • School success. We're facing a few issues with Ruby's schooling at the moment - nothing major or to be concerned about - but just something that we might need to push a bit harder on to ensure she's getting what she needs. I'm hoping that over the next month or so, we can be a bit clearer on what she's getting and what she needs. 
And overall, I'm just hoping that we can feel a bit more settled, a bit more certain of the future, and a bit more like we're hitting our stride with our new life and new routine.

Trust God from the bottom of your heart; don’t try to figure out everything on your own. Listen for God’s voice in everything you do, everywhere you go; he’s the one who will keep you on track. ~ Proverbs 3:5-6 (MSG) 


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